This topic has come back to my mind after quite some time, and I have been wondering about this one for last couple of days. What constitutes flirting?.. what really counts as
flirting.
I began to read few things on line, the first place I went to was wikipedia. It says “Flirting is a form of human interaction, usually expressing a sexual or romantic interest in the other person. It can consist of conversation, body language, or brief physical contact. It may be one-sided or reciprocated.”. You can read rest of it here
First impression I got was that its very subjective, I mean I might have some really wild ideas about romance which the other person may have no clues about, so when she does these things I might feel that she is showing romantical interest in me. Does this mean she is flirting with me?..
Actually the whole topic started when one person asked me why I was trying to flirt with
her, where the truth was that I had not tried to do that, and I was kind of surprised at
what kind of wrong signals I was sending. Also in a totally different instance one of my friends felt that a girl whom we both knew was totally trying to flirt with me. Again there too I failed to recognize this. Mainly because I did not have such an inclination towards her.
Does this mean that, we tend to see things when we feel its there?, I mean we want to see romance thats when we tend to give more importance to what the other person is doing and end up trying to read signals from that, and see he/she ids flirting?.
Is it based on experience?, I mean If I have used a particular way to be noticed by the other person, say try to strike a conversation every now and then, now when I see someone else doing it to me, I feel that she is flirting?. Or may be the media too has a hand in it, I mean when they keep showing in the movies that say smiling at you always is a form of flirting, and both the parties know about it, one who wants to flirt may end up using the smile as a means, and the other person might recognise its flirting when others do it.
There are few obvious things, which I think should not be called flirting, say trying to call one person for no reason, talking for hours together on no subjects, or trying to send text messages often, or even giving uncalled for gifts. I think these are extreme steps, and more of wooing rather than flirting. Flirting I guess is more a subtle way of letting know you have romantic interests.
How bad is flirting?, I mean is it bad when some tries to show a romantic interest in you?, hmm i don’t think its bad, but I also see that it depends on my mood, and the person, I mean if you find a person whom you don’t like trying to flirt with you obviously you might get upset, or angry. I think on the whole innocent flirting might be a very natural thing in humans, in fact I think this must be natural in other forms of life apart from humans as well.
Guys you tell me what you think is flirting, what people do makes you feel they are flirting, how serious offence do you think it is?
